The Rich Miser

Caveman Beer Reviews: Red Stripe

Note: This is a series I call Caveman Beer Reviews, because I like to drink beer but am a caveman when it comes to beer knowledge. I know only the basics, and do not have a refined palate. I’ll review the beers on price and what they look, smell, and taste like to me.

Beer: Red Stripe

Bottom Line: A flavorless brew that I won’t buy again. It tastes like extremely light beer, almost to the point of club soda.

Price: About $12.49 for a 12-pack of 11 ounce bottles.

My Rating: 1.5 out of 5


Bob Marley. Usain Bolt. Patrick Ewing (yes, that Patrick Ewing). Bobsledding. One of the coolest accents on earth. The list goes on. Jamaica consistently punches well above its weight in its contributions to humanity.

Thinking of this reputation, I was excited that my wife surprised me with a bottle of Red Stripe. Little did I know that I was in for a letdown.

Origin: Jamaica

Alcohol: 4.7%

Looks: A short, thick, dark glass bottle with a simple label. The beer itself is a light yellow color.

Smell: Very light beer smell.

Taste: I had high hopes for Red Stripe, but I was disappointed because it simply has no taste. It is very gaseous and tastes like extremely light beer; but it’s just so light that it almost resembles club soda, with the faintest hints of malt.

I sat there for a while, drinking this down and trying to discern some sort of flavor. Try as I might, though, I simply could not make out much.

Hangover Factor: Nothing unusual. I’m a male in reasonably good health born in 1983.

Final Thoughts

I really can’t say much for the Red Stripe, since it just does not taste like much. On the positive side, it’s not that expensive, so your wallet won’t be that much lighter if you decide to give it a try.

Live it up, spend less.
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